It's not the right time.

It's not the right time to even think about this. But I am still gonna write it out anyway, to confess to you.

Hi, M.

I started to read the novel, "Twilight" yesterday. It's a story that I have been wanting to know more about. I've always thought that reading novel enable us to have more imaginations than watching the movie.

Do you know that Edward and Bella had their first conversation in the biology lab? So do us.

Well, not really. We'd had short conversations before we became lab partner. Short conversations about where to get the textbooks and how's SPM result. Like super short. Because I didn't look friendly enough, I guess.

On the day itself, when teacher was randomly pairing up students, I prayed so that I could have you as my partner. Because I want to know more of you. I was so lucky. We chatted and you asked those random questions. I didn't really interact with guys back in secondary school. You didn't have the communication skills with girls either. So we were two random strangers talking to each other, trying to keep the conversation ongoing.

I was surprised when you sent me a fb message on that weekend, asking about the homework. I was in the middle of the 30 Hour Famine event. I got distracted, chatting through the message, and I even asked you what did you have for your dinner. I was a little hungry though.

Then, we started to have weekend chats.

Few weeks later, we chatted almost everyday. Almost. But sometimes the conversation just hanged there.

We started to invite each other to some clubs' events, of course, in the end we brought our friends along. I will never forget the funny and awkward moments when we went to the field trip to IMU Open Day.

You always travel in your pack. I travel in mine too. Somehow both our packs don't really clique and we never have lunch together. Yet. Soon enough. I'll make it happen. I know you guys want it too. "Hohohoho", this is your santa laugh.

I like the way you call my name in the middle of the class, to inform me something. Others wouldn't notice much though. :) Have I ever called your name? Or am I used to poking you on your shoulder?

Should I think of myself as the special one? No, I shouldn't. I am pretty sure that you do talk to other girl classmates too! You're a chatterer who is capable of creating any random topic and somehow carry the topic further.

Thanks for bringing us to Rakuzen last Friday. That was my first time being there though. :) You've got my purse raped. LOL. That's how you said it. We didn't have much conversation on that day. I should have walked by your side when we're on our way to the restaurant. There were 9 of us walking to the destination, and you were the one showing us the way. No one wants to be the odd one out. Me neither. But, thank you for bringing us there.

We chat through Facebook most of the time. How I wish I could talk to you in the class. But no way, you have your joejoe and cutie always around you... How am I supposed to get there? You know it too.

All these feelings... are inexplicable. It's like I've fallen for you, but I don't think I do. I don't really feel the increasing heartbeat rate when you're around, I don't really feel anything when you touched my hand during the bio practical class.

Maybe... it's because of the font style of my phone. I used to re-read the conversations between my friends and I. The current font style looks a little like my handwriting. I like it so much. Because of it, I can almost imagine the way that you reply my message in your tone, I can almost hear you talking to me in my head. I can almost hear my friends' voices when I read the messages. Because of the font style, I could see the emotions that flow in the messages. Too much... till I start to daydream.

I think I can figure all these out someday... I know I can. And I know these feelings will somehow fade away... it's just the matter of time. :)

Thanks for walking into my life. Isn't life amazing when a total stranger walk into your life and later becomes the most important person? You're not the most important person of mine, but you're kinda an important person of mine.

I know I can count on you. I wanna let you know that you can count on me too. This is what friends are supposed to do! :)

So, here's the end of my confession. I know you'll never see this. I post it to express my feelings. Hehe.

Ciao, my lab partner. :)